Ode to Diapers

Dear Diapers,

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I kind of miss you. I know I complained about your mess, your smell, and having to haul you everywhere. I whined about washing you and longed for the days when I would never have to hose poop off you again.

I didn’t know how good I had it.

You made it so that I didn’t have to drop everything I was doing for a potty break.

With you, I didn’t have to run across Target to make it to the bathroom.

I didn’t have to stop eating mid-bite to take a kid to the bathroom. And then take the second one as soon as I sat down again.

When you were in my life, I didn’t have to squeeze into a public bathroom stall with two kids, squat on the floor to keep them from falling in, or hold them up to the sink to wash hands.

I didn’t have to deal with a kid freaking out about automatic flushers or loud hand dryers.

Most importantly, I didn’t have to worry about little hands opening the stall door every single time I dared to use the toilet myself.

All of this to say, I’m sorry I was so hard on you. I hope your next family appreciates your hard work,

With fondness,


  1. Ha, I second this! This weekend, I had to introduce E to a port-a-potty at the park. She understandably refused and we sprinted in a stroller almost a mile to the nearest grocery store 🙂

  2. Just found a post you did about being a Retail Widow in 2009 after searching the web for one other person who understands what I am always dealing with. I then went to your most current post…and realized that you know EXACTLY almost everything I am going through! Spent the morning in the car after a poop accident at home wishing that I still had my emergency diaper in the car because I would have at least put it underneath her in case of a second accident. Then I had to prop her up on the highest toilet for giants ever manufactured, and remind her not to open the stall while mommy’s “booty is hanging out.” Love the way you write! You are hysterical!!!
    Love, Raquel…Fellow mother, teacher, retail widow, infertility sufferer, and writer (I’m more on the home made novel spectrum but infrequently blog). Thank you for helping me feel like I’m not alone in the world:)

  3. You can have our diapers! So tired of toddler poop. Then again, your stall scenario isn’t exactly enticing. Am adding you to my approved readers list (if I can find your email) – had to go private bc of being a teacher and all. Would love to have you follow.

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